Blissings Issue 4
Remedies for Rotten Moods
By Miriam Evers
“I’ve
had enough,” Carol exploded. “It’s been a bad week:
I've lost my favourite scarft, my house is a mess, my teenage son
is failing school, and my husband spends all his time working or
watching TV.” She burst into tears. “And when I stepped
on the scale this morning, I’d put on three pounds.”
Overwhelmed
by the sheer pace of her life, Carol, my normally fun-loving and
competent client, was at the end of her rope.
“I’m
mad at myself - I can’t find any joyful thoughts,” she
continued. “And now I’m worried that with all these depressing
thoughts the only thing I’m going to attract is more depressing
events.”
Have
you ever felt like this – worried, frustrated, and overwhelmed?
It happens to all of us from time to time.
When
you are feeling worried and overwhelmed, you don’t have access
to bliss – sometimes you can’t even get to just OK. But
it takes reaching for joy to turn things around. What a paradox!
So what can you do?
First,
remember you can’t jump from overwhelm to joy in one leap.
It’s a gradual thing, so:
1.
Stop. Stop moving. Take a time out to be still, even if it’s
just 5 seconds.
2.
Breathe. Take a few deep breaths and come fully into the moment.
Notice what is going on in your body.
3.
Accept yourself exactly where you are right now. Let it be ok
to feel what you are feeling, to be human and fallible. It’s
just a temporary place on the way to someplace better.
4.
Remember who you really are. You’ve just forgotten in this
moment that you are much more than just this physical body separated
in time and space from other bodies. You are a pure positive extension
of Source Energy or God. Your basic essence is pure unconditional
love and joy.
Allow
yourself to feel your emotions – all of them. When the fuel
gauge in your car hits low, you don’t beat it up, do you? Of
course not! It’s simply an indication that your car is running
low on fuel.
Your
feelings are a wonderful guidance system; when you feel low it’s
an indication that your thoughts aren’t in sync with what your
Source Energy knows to be true. When you doubt your worth, that
awful feeling lets you know that you are not aligned with the Divine.
So, when you can’t go instantly from overwhelm to joy, don’t
beat yourself up – when you can’t access thoughts of joy,
reach for relief from your pain, frustration and worry first –
try soothing yourself.
So
how can you soothe yourself?
5.
Focus on what you want
6.
Reach for thoughts that feel better.
In
the example above, Carol started with the one thing that was bothering
her the worst at the moment: the state of her home.
What
she wanted was to have a clean, organized, comfortable home where
she could find what she needed and where she could relax –
and she wanted her husband and son to help in maintaining it that
way.
To
soothe herself, she told herself:
-
I’ve been able to get my home organized before.
- I
don’t have to do it all at once.
- I
have some things in my space that I don't really need that would
be easy to get rid off.
She kept talking to herself in this vein and gradually started to
feel a little better. And from this place of feeling a little better,
it was easier to reach for other good-feeling thoughts. Eventually,
she was able to come up with some soothing thoughts about her relationship
with her husband and with her son.
- I
appreciate how my husband helps out with the trash and recycling.
- I
appreciate how my son cleans up the dishes after supper.
Within
the next few minutes, from this place of feeling better, Carol remembered
that she was a powerful creator and could design her life as she
wanted. She came up with some inspired ideas about what action steps
she could take.
- She
would take time each morning to meditate and create her day with
intentions.
- She
would share with her husband and son what she appreciated about
them and ask them for a little more help around the house.
- She
would devote 15 minutes a day to clear out a small area of her
home.
Once
Carol was feeling better, the ideas came quickly and easily. Once
she could access her inner source, her ideas were inspired by love
and joy.
Here’s
a recap:
When
you are not feeling good, you lack confidence and your efforts are
laced with struggle. You can see only a few possibilities.
When
you feel good, you have more confidence, you feel more worthy and
you have access to more possibilities. In your joy, you connect
with the energy that makes things happen.
So
when you’re feeling crappy, crabby, and cranky (not to mention
sorry for yourself …)
1.
Stop.
2. Breathe.
3. Accept yourself exactly where you are right now.
4. Remember who you really are.
5. Focus on what you want.
6. Reach for thoughts that feel better.
Remember:
the better you feel, the better your life works. Reclaim your power
by reclaiming your joy. Joy first. And anything else you have time
for.
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